Saturday, April 3, 2010
I have long taken offense to the kind of movies that Samuel L Jackson seems to consider his forte but as far as names go 'Snakes on a Plane' has to be, hands down, the most laziest choice of a movie title in the history of man. You'd have to be like "Snakes on a Plane? Hmmm, I wonder what that movie is gonna be about?". I mean, what is the point of watching it anymore! Did the director decide that the suspense would be too intense for Samuel L Jackson's octagenarian fanboys? Its as if they decided that the audience couldn't handle anything more than the blatantly obvious.
If only every movie ever made had names that told it like it is. The movie going experience would be just so much richer and exciting. You can just imagine 'The Matrix' being called 'Guy killing robots in alternate reality with super special effects' or 'Memento' being called 'Movie played backwards to simulate amnesiac recovering'. 'The Shawshank redemption' would become 'Man digs out of prison with Morgan Freeman voiceover' while 'Million Dollar baby' would be 'Boxing with Morgan Freeman voiceover'.
The greatest films of our time would be reduced to nothingness at the hands of the people who came up with 'Snakes on a Plane'. I can hardly imagine '12 angry men' occupying the 7th slot of the IMDB top 100 if it were called something like 'Hung Jury: 96 minutes'. Or 'The Usual Suspects' being called 'No way! 'Twas Kevin Spacey all along!" and still leaving you breathless at that last scene.
We must really thank the stars that not every film producer is so factual in deciding the names of upcoming blockbusters. Oh and before you notice and craft your brilliantly sarcastic comments, the title of the post is intended to be ironic.
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